BATTERY
The Energizer Bunny, known best for "going and going and going..." passed
away last evening at 12:42am this morning. Upon completion of the autopsy early this morning, the
chief medical examiner ruled that the death was caused by acute cardiac arrest, induced by sexual
over-stimulation. Apparently, someone put the battery in backwards and the bunny kept coming and
coming and coming... Foul play has not been ruled out.